The Muppet Movie (1979)

Original poster - credit: Associated Film Distribution
(according to Wikipedia anyway)

Plot

The film starts with the Muppets holding a screening of their first movie (yeah, before Spaceballs, Mel Brooks was in this movie, probably where he got the idea for a movie within a movie, WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID BROOKS!!!! (Warning - the last sentence might contain sarcasm, for a brighter tomorrow).  It's rather silly, as you'd come to expect with a Muppet movie, lots of one-liners and then the opening credits roll.

Imagine trying to keep this lot
under control, no wonder Kermit
always sounds stressed!
No credits, can't find any.

Kermit the Frog is living in his swamp, singing about rainbows and being a mate with a crocodile, when a talent agent called Bernie (the late, great, da-da-DDDDDDAAAAA, Dom DeLuise) bumps into Kermit and convinces him to attend a talent audition in Holywood.  When he starts this journey, he meets Doc Hopper (Charles Durning) and his assistant Max (Austin Pendleton), who try to persued him to be their spokes-frog for Hoppers' Fried Frog Legs Business.  Kermit gives a hard pass, but they won't take no for an answer and a pursuit throughout the film starts.


Along the way to Holywood, Kermit meets up with Fozzie (bar-fight), Scooter (managing the Electric Mayhem band), Gonzo and Camilla (car crash), Sweetums (selling said cars to a shady car salesman), Miss Piggy (beauty pageant) and others along the way.  Somehow, they all join Kermit on his dream to entertain the world, apart from Sweetums who they forget, and the Electric Mayhem, who are too busy jamming.  To be honest, it sounds more like a cult when you read it on Wikipedia, but Kermit is too nice for that.  Fozzie though, he'd be in a cult in a flash, never trusted him.

Mel Brooks, stealing material! ;-)
No credits, can't find any!

After a date between Miss Piggy and Kermit goes wrong (oh, those guys and their misunderstandings), they are kidnapped by Hopper and his goons, taken to Professor Max Krassman (Mel Brooks aka, scene-stealer (We know what you did!!!! (Must confess, love his stuff, but also love being silly))), a scientist who is going to brainwash Kermit.  This ultimately fails, because of reasons, you know what you're getting with a Muppets film, they're not going to end up harmed.  That would be a dark and silly film if they did that, see The Happytime Murders for further details of that.

After they escape, the gang escape and get stranded in the desert.  But they're rescued by the Electric Mayhem band, as the gang had given them a script so they'd know where to find them.  It's a plot twist that would make Deadpool laugh. :-)  Whilst this is happening, Hooper is sick of his gangs' failure to capture Kermit, so he hires a Frog Killer to hunt them down.  This prompt Max to dress as a Motorcycle Cop to warn Kermit and the gang.  Kermit decides enough is enough, telling Max to inform Hopper to meet Kermit in the conveniently close ghost-town, which looks nothing like an abandoned cowboy set.

Muppets doing their Warriors take
No credits, can't find any!

Before Hooper and his cronies arrive, Kermit and Co meet Dr Bunsen Honeydew and his assistant, Beaker, who are using the town to conduct experiments in secret.  Mostly making things bigger with marshmallows, which they leave carelessly around.  Hooper arrives and after a heartwarming shout with Kermit, decides to kill the frog as he will not be his spokes-frog (a dark twist which was not expected).  However, Animal has eaten one of the giant growing marshmallows, smashing through the roof of Honeydew's lab building, scaring away the bad guys.

This leaves the group very little time to make it to Holywood, where they go into the offices of studio executive Lew Lord (Orson Wells), asking if he would consider giving them a shot at fame.  He agrees, giving them the standard 'rich and famous' contract.  This leads to the gang singing a song in front of a pastiche of their adventures, which is destroyed because of "reasons".  Then, a rainbow shines on them, more muppets (and the gang from Sesame Street) turn up.  Then Sweetums runs through the screen of the original screening (remember the start of the movie) and a big argument starts, roll credits, etc.

Pros

Muppets were always big on
musical numbers, part of their charm.
No credits, can't find any.

+ The story is a simple one, it plays to the strength of the muppets.  A thin plot to have some comedy beats, chicken flirting, bad-bear jokes from a cult leader in the making, a million cameos and a happy ending to send the audience home with a smile.  What more would you want from one of these movies?

+ Whilst you get the whole gang here, it focuses on the core of Kermit, Fozzie, Gonzo and Piggy.  Each of the other Muppets gets their time to shine but never to the determent of the movie.  It's rather quick in that regard.

+ The songs are catchy and will be familiar to anyone who grew up with The Muppets.  Nothing is out of place there, as it's standard for these movies to have musical numbers.  It would be a rather strange movie if it didn't have such numbers, a dark and depressing world indeed.

+ It's also an easy movie to watch, you don't need to read too much into it, as it's got the depth of an empty can of pop.  But this isn't a serious film, it's the first Muppet Movie, so you're not gonna get something like a Wes Anderson production!

Cons

Have you had an accident that wasn't
your fault?
No credits, can't find any!

+ Like a lot of Muppets films, it's over heavy on the cameos.  I mean there are sixteen cameos in this movie alone.  Some of them I didn't know, but when said person has a line or two, you soon realise that they are the cameo for that scene.  I've always been a fan of just a few famous faces turning up, but, to be honest, this is just me splitting hairs.

Final Verdict

The Muppet Movie is a perfect, all-ages entertainment film, it's as offensive as your favourite meal and still makes me chuckle.  It's by no means a perfect movie, some parts look a little rough around the edges.  However, that's part of its charm, because it has that innocent, rough and ready edge.  The real art of the muppets is when they break the fourth wall, it feels natural.  When people encounter them, they don't look shocked at these puppets, they live in a reality where the Muppets are part of the everyday encounters that they have.  People just accept them for who they are, which is a lesson some people need to learn about other humans, just so you can get the subtle hint, respect everyone and don't be a douche canoe.  You don't come into a Muppet movie looking for high drama, you watch it to be entertained for an hour and a bit, some positive message and Gonzo being shot out of a cannon.  For full disclosure, I've always identified with Gonzo, we could make a business called Whatever Incorporated.  Take that Disney, me and my blue buddy will take on the world!

Who wears short shorts!
No credits, can't find any

I know I put the cameo's in the cons, but to be honest, that was only to prevent you from looking at an empty piece of screen.   Cameo's are part of the deal, a natural step from their guts of the week on the Muppets show.  Look at the list of people who were cameos here: Richard Pryor, Steve Martin (my favourite of the lot), James Coburn, Bob Hope, Madeline Kahn, Elliott Gould, Telly Savalas, Carol Kane and more.  It was a good section of up & comers, with some legends (see Dom DeLuise and Orson Wells), just like the Muppets themselves. 

And here is the happy ending....
Before Sweetums runs in....
No credits, can't find any!

If people are expecting a bashing, they'll have to go to another blog, as it ain't happening here.  For me, The Muppet Movie is the start of a series of movies, one which starts with the right tone, a little gem of innocence and fun.  Well, apart from the wanting to kill Kermit bit, that was just strange.  But overall, you would be hard pushed to find a film that was not originally owned by Disney (which it is now, more on that in other reviews) that still feels as comforting now as it would have done when it was new.  Sure, it's no 10-star classic, but it's a good one all the same.

7 out of ten - A fun-filled caper to the Muppets cinematic catalogue, one which sets the tones for movies to come.